Again, after all is done, nothing is said. The absence of words devours me and I no longer know where or what to turn to. My audacity leads me nowhere and I feel like a step forward takes me miles back. Why would this pain in my heart not go away? Is it that deserved? How much more is it owed?

I look far in the emptiness of the vast and see tumults that crowd my vision, blind me from myself. I know I can no longer sustain this….this feeling that is unearned, unwanted—invading my felicity, conquering my every thought. I’d give anything for a full happy day!

My life as I knew it, no longer is. It is broken apart by the never surrendering thought of the created and its destruction, the forgotten and the process of having had it all and losing it.

I find myself in fear, uncertain, questioning my life and knowing almost for sure that I cannot make it without you but you have left me and ditched my love without second thought. I have always feared the unknown and the close reality that hovers around it is now visible like the morning dew in a mountain and inevitable like the passing of time. I am coping though!!